Individual Therapy

Picture of orange and blue couch next to each other, laptop open on orange couch, and tree in background between the couches.

Therapy to learn how to live Life on your own terms

Life can become wildly overwhelming so quickly, and when you’ve been taught to just put your head down and keep moving, it’s easy to start feeling like you’re drowning.  When you’re stuck in the past or constantly have that voice in your head, telling you ‘it’s not good enough; you’re not good enough yet’, joy and happiness end up feeling like they’re further and further away. Maybe you’re even at a point of feeling like throwing up your hands and saying to hell with it all, why bother - because nothing feels like it could really ever be different.

Maybe you’ve thought about therapy, or someone has suggested it - but even that feels overwhelming. You might catch yourself thinking:

‘Will talking about my problems really even help?’ 

‘Isn’t it easier to just shove everything aside and keep trudging forward?’  

In the thick of your suffering it’s so hard to see that life could be different.

Anxiety, unresolved trauma, fear, depression…. these emotions can keep you stuck in a life that feels heavy, exhausting and unfulfilling. Trapped in the same cycles, you feel like nothing will ever be different… but what if it could be? 

Often, just having a safe space to be seen and heard can help lift the burden of what you’re struggling with. And, sometimes it’s more complicated than just needing a safe space to talk and think out loud. You could have trauma, but aren’t sure if you should call your experiences that, because it feels like that word is thrown around all the time. Or, maybe it doesn't feel like your experiences were ‘traumatic.’  So Mom yelled a lot, or Dad was an alcoholic. Who cares that you changed schools every year or that kids bullied you - so many people had it worse… right? What if it was worse…. an assault, physical or emotional abuse, a horrific accident… You should just move on and get over it.  All of that couldn’t possibly be impacting you now. Or could it? 

Do you:

  • Overfunction or overschedule

  • Act as a people pleaser

  • Put the needs of others ahead of yourself

  • Struggle to have close, intimate relationships

  • Feel chronically tired or sick

  • Have intrusive thoughts or flashbacks 

  • Live with intense feelings of fear, anxiety, or panic

  • Have difficult connecting with others or feel like your relationships are unstable

If you’re feeling any of these things - they’re all symptoms of unresolved trauma. That trauma is holding you back from the life you’ve always wanted… that life you maybe have started to think wasn’t possible.

On some level, you know life isn't meant to be pushed through or just simply survived.  Yet you continue to push the boulder down the road, hoping that in a day, or month or year there will be time and space for things to change. There’s a part of you that knows you need space for you to heal so that you can start living the life you actually want. You long for improvement, the desire for inner peace, and the need to quiet the relentless inner critic. There’s a deep desire you feel, to find a voice that is reassuring you that safety and acceptance are within reach despite past mistakes, imperfections, and circumstances that were out of your control

You’ve lived this way up until now, because it worked for you. It kept you safe by creating disconnections where you weren’t sure how to connect. It kept you busy and occupied so you didn’t have to deal with or feel your feelings. 

The longer you stayed in this place, the more it became familiar and comfortable. 

image of stacked rocks at the beach

Are you ready to be honest about yourself and the life you're living? Do you feel capable of unpacking those boxes that have been stuffed in the closet and stored for so long? Are you ready to stop shoving stuff aside for the sake of being able to continue to barely function and only survive? Do you catch yourself wondering what life could look or feel like if you were actually thriving?

If you’re asking yourself any of these questions - it’s time to start individual therapy.

I’ll be honest, the therapy path isn’t always easy.  Things will get messy at times. The process of unpacking all of our stuff and looking at it - really looking at it - can be overwhelming. 

Individual therapy is one on one work in a safe space where you are heard and accepted exactly as you are. These sessions will help you unload the pain you’ve been carrying, and be a place where you’ll learn how to take the necessary steps to understand not only what’s been holding you back, but also how to create the life you really want.  

Individual therapy focuses on the relationship you have with your Self first, and then we’ll look at how you behave and function in the world around you.

We’ll spend time working on healing traumas you’ve experienced, breaking apart old patterns of behavior, and reconstructing the stories you’ve been told or that were created about who the world has perceived you as. 

My relationship-focused approach is all about reconnecting to yourself first, so that you can be all the things you need to be, both in and for the other parts of your life.  You can break free from old patterns and narratives that have guided you to this place that now feels overwhelming and is no longer working for you. From understanding and releasing that negative voice that seems to run your day, to learning how to communicate what it is you need from those in your life (because after all, an unasked need or want can NEVER be met), to learning new skills to decrease stress and anxiety and make you feel more connected in life - you’ll build experiences of relief as you learn how to find and use your voice, while prioritizing how you care for yourself. You’ll learn how to respond and not react, in order to find a way to be seen and heard. We’ll build a toolbox that will carry you through both the good and the bad.

Sometimes individual therapy can include taking the time to look more deeply at  your relationships with others: are you struggling with your spouse, children, boss, or immediate or extended family?  The way you’ve ‘always been’ has started to shift and move, and as a result, the people in your life aren’t as comfortable with the new you.  Maybe the way you’ve related to those around no longer works for you, and it’s leaving you feeling exhausted and overextended, or feeling unheard and dismissed. You know you want your relationships to look and feel different. Those changes always start with individual work. Uncover the person you want to be, shift how you move in the world and then learn the tools you need to show up in your relationships in a way that will help you create the connections you most desire. 

The life you’ve always wanted is waiting for you. It’s possible to change the way you live in the world - you can improve your relationships, set down the task list, and find space to feel calm, safe, and fulfilled. Healing is possible and your story can be rewritten. Take the first step to create a new path, learn to live life on your terms, and create the healthy relationships you deeply desire, starting with the relationship you have with yourself. 

My Approach

Let’s start with this - you and I are a team.  I just don’t sit and nod my head and say ‘tell me more.’

People are the most successful in therapy when they have a good relationship with their therapist - and that means that I’m not just going to sit there silently while you talk. We’ll work together to unpack all the places you’ve been stuck, the traumas or old stories you’ve held on to for way too long, and we’ll rebuild your relationships starting with the one you have with yourself. 

I find my clients tend to feel better, faster, when I offer various types of therapy that I weave together during sessions. When I do this, it’s always going to be based on your unique needs and goals, and what makes sense for you as an individual. By integrating techniques such as CBT (cognitive-behavioral therapy), mindfulness practices, IFS (Internal Family Systems) and EMDR, I create a holistic approach to help you find the path that will lead to your growth, feeling empowered, and living the life you want. Together, we’ll explore the ups and downs of your life, so that you can understand yourself better, become stronger, and feel more confident. You'll learn how to tackle your current problems and build skills that will support you long after our sessions end. After all - therapy isn’t just about growing and finding happiness… It's also about learning how to sustain that. 

Often I get asked - ‘do I have to be in therapy forever?’  My answer is no - a  commitment to weekly or bi-weekly sessions for at least six months will help you not only understand and practice the skills you’ll learn, but also come to each session to discuss what is and isn’t working and where you could be stuck. The routine of therapy is meant to support you in taking steps towards the growth you most want, and help you figure out how to sustain that in the long term on your own.

There are so many different mountains any one of us will have to climb throughout our lives. When you’re doing that on your own, not only putting the effort into climbing but also putting effort into being your own sherpa - that’s exhausting.

I’m here to carry that part for you, and be your sherpa, so that all you have to do is climb.

If you’re ready to get started, click that button and reach out today.